Blame it on piku!

'piku'!..well..that's actually what my parents call me at home. In fact I like 'piku' more than the now so common' shounak', atleast no one really would have to struggle so much pronouncing it as much as they do with the latter. But more importantly, piku is something that i am, actually and not the intellectual that shounak conjures up in people's minds when they hear my real name or atleast when they see the thickly bespectacled form of mine. Never mind!..got used to it now..i wish i could habituate myself with the same ease to the other difficult things in life. And ya..thats wat irks me the most..even though i have seen it all so often now, the failures , the sucessess, I am still not prepared for wats coming up next,always trying to work on patterns(the ridiculous belief of mine that since all odd years have been good for me, so would the coming odd years too-scary!). Well, that perhaps explains why the ever-changing Common aptitude Test(CAT) still eludes me (sob!!!). Well..sometimes..i wish i would have stayed piku all my life ..secluded..never ready to grow up...but then perhaps..too much of pikuism isnt so good...After all, one has to face up the real challenges in life...be a much stronger person. Hmmm..true. Everyday, when I wake up in the morning for work,I simply not feel like moving out of the dreamy world that pulls me back from going ahead and stepping into what everyone says the "real" world. Maybe it's all piku's fault, the people and the things who always want me to stay piku and not want to be the more practical and struggling-in-this-real-world shounak.